How to motivate yourself to change your behavior | Tali Sharot | TEDxCambridge

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  • 27/10/2014 को प्रकाशित
  • What does make us change our actions? Tali Sharot reveals three ingredients to doing what's good for yourself.
    Dr. Tali Sharot is a neuroscientist at University College London and the director of the Affective Brain Lab. She is a faculty member of the department of Experimental Psychology, a Wellcome Trust Fellow, and currently a visiting Professor at Harvard Medical School. Her research focuses on how emotion, motivation, and social factors influence our expectations, decisions, and memories.
    This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at

टिप्पणियाँ • 3 150

  • Grace Ann Neri
    Grace Ann Neri साल पहले +1562

    1. Social incentives
    2. Immediate reward
    3. Progress monitoring

    • Francesco Veronese
      Francesco Veronese 20 दिन पहले

      @Archeed o

    • Chan
      Chan महीने पहले +1

      So proud of army's trying to work on themselves too!! FIGHTING!

    • Kiew Bee Lim
      Kiew Bee Lim 3 महीने पहले +1


    • MK Ultra PUMP
      MK Ultra PUMP 4 महीने पहले


  • Diego Martinez
    Diego Martinez साल पहले +424

    -Science shows that warning has little influence on behavior; it's effective but limited.
    -People tend to change their beliefs towards a more desirable option (in all ages)
    -Kids, teenagers, and elderly people are less likely to learn from warnings
    Three principles that drive the behavior and mind
    1-Social incentive: we are motivated through the positive actions of others.
    2-Immediate reward: reward your good behavior.
    3-Progress monitoring: We are motivated by seeing progress.
    -Highlight the process, not the decline
    -Giving people a sense of control is a motivator

    • Yasser Jalali
      Yasser Jalali 23 दिन पहले

      @Gaurav B hi. could I help to write a report? This has bing my favourite topic since tow years ago

    • Sandman7101
      Sandman7101 महीने पहले +1

      Appreciate this a lot

    • Gaurav B
      Gaurav B 8 महीने पहले +3

      thanks for this brother youve helped me more that you can imagine i can write my report now

    • Dark life
      Dark life 8 महीने पहले +3


    • Clear Contentment
      Clear Contentment 8 महीने पहले +2

      Push and pull

  • Question Everything But WHY
    Question Everything But WHY 2 साल पहले +1361

    “When dealing with people, remember you are not dealing with creatures of logic, but with creatures bristling with prejudice and motivated by pride and vanity.”
    ― Dale Carnegie

    • Zoe R
      Zoe R साल पहले

      And money.

    • Change Eye Color
      Change Eye Color साल पहले


    • Cocoa
      Cocoa साल पहले +1

      This is the OPPOSITE of what she was saying.

    • The Melancholy of Gay
      The Melancholy of Gay साल पहले

      vanity, pinning me down

    • Quirky Flyer
      Quirky Flyer साल पहले


  • Aaron, Dawn of Man
    Aaron, Dawn of Man साल पहले +2824

    All of these 2020 comments taught me that we are all coming here for self help. Proud of you all

    • Jade Lopez
      Jade Lopez 3 महीने पहले

      @Passerby 42 ioiiqoqu

    • Serenity Vigil
      Serenity Vigil 3 महीने पहले +1


    • Colby Kneale
      Colby Kneale 3 महीने पहले


    • Vella Esqueda
      Vella Esqueda 5 महीने पहले

      @Aaron, Dawn of Man 0

    • Aaron, Dawn of Man
      Aaron, Dawn of Man 5 महीने पहले

      @Brett Weltz everything my fathers been helping me attain as well. This is great to hear and proud of your growth.
      Keep being excellent and grow that list of accomplishments even further!

  • Your Calm Place - Meditation
    Your Calm Place - Meditation साल पहले +224

    My comment will probably get lost but whoever reads this.. You got this! Whatever you are going through will get better hang in there ✨❤️

  • Julia B
    Julia B साल पहले +6398

    i even had to motivate myself to watch this

    • manjari das
      manjari das 2 दिन पहले

      So true! 😂

    • Aran
      Aran 3 दिन पहले


    • نماذج فروض و إمتحانات
      نماذج فروض و إمتحانات महीने पहले

      Same here

    • Mouhamed Ba
      Mouhamed Ba महीने पहले

      I watched the entire video. It looks interesting. Most important things I learnt from this video are: If we want to motivate people, we have to give them a some kind of power, Many people try motivate people negatively, telling them about the wrong side, for example, the fear of loosing money leads to inaction; the best way to motivate people or ourselve is employing progressing, for example, instead of telling someone ‘Stop smoking, otherwise you will suffer from cancer therefore you will die’, we can tell him ‘ You know, if you stop smoking, you will improve well in sport’; important things to keep in mind in order to motivate ourselve or people: Social Incentive,immediate rewards, and progress monitoring.

    • Mouhamed Ba
      Mouhamed Ba महीने पहले


  • Aeonized
    Aeonized 2 साल पहले +203

    If people knew this, raising children, teaching students, motivating coworkers, then we'd have a better world.

    • James Grosspietsch
      James Grosspietsch साल पहले +8

      I had to watch this 2-3 times to really grasp what she was saying. She is not saying HOW TO motivate ourself rather HOW WE get motivated.
      1. Social incentive- we are motivated through the positive actions of others. Ex. If we see our friend post a picture of themself at the gym then we want to do the same.
      2. Progress monitoring- We are motivated by seeing progress. Ex. If we start working out too and we see progress by weighing ourself then that helps motivate us to continue.
      3. Immediate Reward- reward your good behavior. Ex. If i workout this whole week then I will treat myself over the weekend. Maybe some pizza or ice cream 😉

  • Joniel Jordan
    Joniel Jordan साल पहले +12

    I just love the way how she, with evidence, goes through science to practical life. Amazing!. Thank you so much!

  • Rizal Malawi
    Rizal Malawi 4 साल पहले +2908

    I know why social media is very addictive for us. Because it gives us the immediate reward by the time we post something (‘likes’ notification) which we don’t easily get in a real social interaction. That’s why some people look superior in social media but lack of confidence in their real life. By listening to this talk, I definitely agree that we need to focus more on the progress of what we/other people do, instead of the results. Because we cannot please people to give us the reward, so we have to value our progressing work as the reward.

    • deeprest
      deeprest महीने पहले

      Yah, it was sad that people only look at the result. They are not aware how hard for u to make it happen. Sometimes, they are not contented that will makes u feel pressured and the worst is to be compared with others. My man told me that I act like a doll of everyone because I was afraid of what others would think and before I do something that I really want, I need to envision first if they will feel bad about it. I always wanted to be the best daughter that's why I considered myself as a doll of my mom lols.

    • thanh tung
      thanh tung 11 महीने पहले

      gold comment!

    • Gnani Swami
      Gnani Swami 2 साल पहले


    • PelikuLAGOM
      PelikuLAGOM 2 साल पहले +1

      If not for business, I'm not gonna log in to social medial again.

    • Akhsin Ilhami
      Akhsin Ilhami 2 साल पहले

      Hello fellow Indonesian

  • Anna Dobysh
    Anna Dobysh महीने पहले +5

    I used to hate my fears and try to avoid them. But then, to overcome them i push myself to do what is scared me again and again. It's changed my behaviour to the amazing life where there is no place for fears and anger.

  • HY G
    HY G 10 महीने पहले +3

    The talk is really inspiring, not in the sense of giving us concrete tips about how to motivate, but provides very helpful ideas of how to make effective plans for the improvement. Thanks for the talk!

  • Michael Ravenwood
    Michael Ravenwood साल पहले +8

    God bless you Tali. I've used this ever since watching it for the first time &, after decades of trying, I've established a daily practice of breath work, visualization, meditation & exercise... I'm grateful for your work & this talk!!!

  • S S
    S S साल पहले +6

    LOVE your animations!! What a great way to introduce something that many have had a huge problem with. Good for you for starting with the core of the issue, which is the motivation to do anything that a person would desire to do.

  • German Dimplez
    German Dimplez साल पहले +20

    13:42 “Highlight the progress. Not the decline.” Scientifically proven fact. How many of us focus on the negative? Thx for the life lesson ❤️

  • 5 Minute Psychology
    5 Minute Psychology 2 साल पहले +2

    Emotional Intelligence is one of these elements of our personality we can work on and develop it. I have been observing my clients as they were working on their EQ and I loved their results. Emotional Intelligence is also a way to understand ourselves better and others, too.

  • leandro baluyotjr
    leandro baluyotjr 2 साल पहले +10

    Very good lecture ! Highlighting the positive outcome of a positive change in our attitude ,behavior and practise on matters that needed improvement correlates with the principle in metaphysics i.e. like attracts like ; we harvest what we've planted .

  • Richard Branam
    Richard Branam साल पहले +1

    Giving people a sense of control is a really important motivator. Motivation is directly connected to the emotional modality of our dopamine secretion, which is directly connected to pleasure, pain lymphatic secretion, equaling instant movement.

  • Chrystal Bess Redding
    Chrystal Bess Redding 2 साल पहले +3

    I know it's been six years since this video was posted and I'm amazed at how up to date this information is! Lately, I have been using positive remarks, giving out short term and long term rewards to my nieces. They love it! They are six and eight years old, whenever they are doing something safe or dangerous I always say 'Hey! let's try something more fun! Later/tomorrow frozen yoghurt and gummy bears afterwards' I love being with them, with my sister though they are a bit different because she spoils them and gives them everything they want at the very moment just to keep them to stay still or stay quiet. I believe that we can learn a lot from children and from mid-twenties adults. Great content!

  • add2console
    add2console 2 साल पहले +21

    To be motivated is to be reminded why you are doing things. There may be times of no progress, then take a break and dont give up. Only you can motivate yourself!

  • Maddie Diamandis
    Maddie Diamandis साल पहले +1

    This was an amazing TED Talk but one thing I’m left wondering is: what is the immediate reward for exercise? She mentioned exercise in a few examples throughout the talk, but I think that’s one of the reasons that staying consistent with working out is so difficult for people. There is no immediate reward.

  • Oisin Devine
    Oisin Devine 2 साल पहले +2

    Such an insightful ted talk with an amazingly articulate way of presenting the scientific research! Really impressed with Tali Sharot.

  • El Panchito Ruso
    El Panchito Ruso 2 साल पहले +45

    “If you set goals and go after them with all the determination you can muster, your gifts will take you places that will amaze you.”

  • Joseph Sapien
    Joseph Sapien साल पहले +1

    It's amazing that we have good men and women to get up there and teach others about ways of living, I really wish that we had more classes like this around 92123, because I know that I could use this to help me better my life

  • Nadia Ham
    Nadia Ham 2 साल पहले +18

    I've been following her for a few months and I think she's amazing, I love her colorful artwork and I've even buy her book, she has a lot of incredible examples and techniques to try, she's a big inspiration for a lot of artists, including myself!

    • Yasser Jalali
      Yasser Jalali 23 दिन पहले

      Could you send me the PDF of her book??

  • Jayani
    Jayani साल पहले +4

    "The fear induces inaction while the thrill of the gains induces action. If we want motivate change or progress we might want to think about the above on how we want to do it". No solution fits all, but this gave a good insight as to deciding the best strategy when dealing with individuals. It's also true that people like to be in control therefore social insentives, motivators and progress monitoring are great tools to use to give them the control while motivating change and progress.

  • William Turner
    William Turner 9 महीने पहले +8

    I feel like other people have always had it so much easier than me. I've always struggled with this so much. It's so hard to motivate myself. I've been watching videos like this thought and it's really helped me. I don't even like TED talks but this helped me today. I needed to hear it

  • Mindset Olympics - “YouNa 윤아”
    Mindset Olympics - “YouNa 윤아” साल पहले +37

    Take away: giving people a sense of control is shown through positivity and rewards, stead of using fear tactics and threats.

  • dat pham
    dat pham 2 साल पहले +3

    Thank you for your great talk
    1. Social incentive
    2. Immediate reward
    3. Progress monitoring

  • High Flyers International
    High Flyers International 25 दिन पहले

    Notas: 1. Socializar 2. Recompensas inmediatas 3. Monitorear el progreso (sensación de control y motivación). La idea central es mover el foco de la parálisis del miedo, hacia la capacidad de mejora.

  • Raghad HAV
    Raghad HAV 2 साल पहले +225

    "Fear induces inactoin while the thril of a gain induces action" well said!

    • Night Moose
      Night Moose साल पहले +1

      @Barbie Girl good breakdown. I put a mirror up in my room a while ago and I think it accidentally transformed my motivation to work out. because now when I do pushups and see the difference in the mirror I think....hmm good stuff......imma do a few more! progress monitoring and an immediate reward all in one!

    • Barbie Girl
      Barbie Girl साल पहले +6

      I had to watch this 2-3 times to really grasp what she was saying. She is not saying HOW TO motivate ourself rather HOW WE get motivated.
      1. Social incentive- we are motivated through the positive actions of others. Ex. If we see our friend post a picture of themself at the gym then we want to do the same.
      2. Progress monitoring- We are motivated by seeing progress. Ex. If we start working out too and we see progress by weighing ourself then that helps motivate us to continue.
      3. Immediate Reward- reward your good behavior. Ex. If i workout this whole week then I will treat myself over the weekend. Maybe some pizza or ice cream 😉

  • crystaltownaz
    crystaltownaz साल पहले +3

    Well organized and presented information. I will use these techniques to motivate my kids to excel in their studies. Thank you!

  • اقرأ لى كتابًا Read to me a book

    You inspired me

    • lelelo
      lelelo 10 महीने पहले


    • Change Eye Color
      Change Eye Color साल पहले


    • Lockheed Martin
      Lockheed Martin साल पहले


    • Sheryar Ahmed
      Sheryar Ahmed साल पहले

      She's an Israelite.

    • Zettai
      Zettai साल पहले +1

      I read this and thought, oh whatever... then I watched the whole thing...

  • Sanket Marutirao Sonawane
    Sanket Marutirao Sonawane 2 साल पहले +36

    The talk really expresses the impact of positive things rather than a threat. Thank you for such a nice talk.

    • D.B.
      D.B. 2 साल पहले

      Sanket Sonawane
      And yet the fear of lose is far greater than the attraction of gain. Go figure.

  • Adam Mortimer
    Adam Mortimer 3 महीने पहले +3

    To all those that continue to seek, grind and make it happen, I honor you! The best is yet to be!!!

  • Lillybelle P
    Lillybelle P 3 साल पहले +3977

    I used to hate doing dishes. I always did them by myself growing up because my 2 siblings one older one younger would start a fight with me and I would fall into their trap by telling them to leave and I would do it by myself which is what they ultimately wanted. Somehow I would be blamed for causing the fights. So if they were gone I couldn't be blamed.
    Fast forward after marriage having to to dishes myself I began to leave them, as my mother did. But one day it changed. I was making a pot of tea. While waiting for the water to boil I was going to leave the kitchen and watch tv. But I would not know when the water was boiling. So I washed the dishes while waiting. It took about the same time to finish the dishes as it took to heat the water and brew the tea. I realized the chore was not as bad as it seemed and I got my reward of a hot cup of tea I enjoyed more knowing I had all ready done the chore I dreaded. I got into doing this everyday. Now
    I dont have to have the tea any more to do the dishes I enjoy doing them knowing how short a time it takes and I do them after every meal. I can enjoy going into the kitchen more because it is neat and clean. I must have had a lot of negative things associated with dishwashing. Thanks to cup of tea, no more.

    • katie i
      katie i साल पहले


    • Lillybelle P
      Lillybelle P साल पहले

      @Perception That is soooooo true. I am stronger in many ways because I am a middle child.

    • Lillybelle P
      Lillybelle P साल पहले

      @Enuff Yerchit My grandmother lived with us from the time I was born. She always was cooking and cleaning. I dont know if my mother ever did I was in grade school. My grandmother died when I was 12. Either from depression of losing her mother or from not doing it my mom didn't keep our house clean. That's why we kids did the dishes. We could never have friends over and if I wanted to have them I had to clean the house. One day a friend from school came over unexpectedly my mother wouldn't let her in. She looked in the window and asked me "Wow doesn't your mother ever clean the house?? " I was so embarrassed I told her my mother had been sick and couldn't. To this day I am mortified if things are not at least picked up and in some order. I am not a fanatic to the point my family is afraid to walk in the house but feeling that way again is something I don't want to experience again. I would rather feel proud of showing my home than ashamed of it. Yes housework will always be there and it is something you would rather put off but for me taking care of it as I go along gives me peace of mind.

    • Lillybelle P
      Lillybelle P साल पहले

      @Susie Frades-White Yes I do and he was working 2 jobs from sun up to sun down.

    • Lillybelle P
      Lillybelle P साल पहले +1

      @Kywen Mook You know Kywen you don't need approval or compliments from anyone; you already know you do a good job at work. Like you said you think about other things in life while doing dishes now. My friend always said she loved to do dishes. I used to think , Really? She said she could listen to her favorite music or sing songs from her choral group. She would light a candle and smell the lovely scent and enjoy her alone time. That too, made an impression on me. That's what you did too. You had your alone time.
      At work you can feel confident and just be happy that you are doing a good job, your best, and that you have a job.That should make you a happy ,quality employee. Don't expect compliments and don't look for them or you will be disappointed. Besides , good hard working dependable employees are hard to find and as a former business owner I can tell you word gets to to top who is Bad ,faster than who is good. Just get your work done, do more than is asked of you when you can and see what wonderful things life has in store for you. If you need or expect compliments and dont get them then you will be unhappy and probably a person that complains and people dont want to be around that .
      I have learned alot in my 70 years and I just enjoy who I am and what I can do for others with no expectations of anything in return. I find just about everyone I meet becomes a friend. And that makes my life sweet.

  • Rafa
    Rafa साल पहले +37

    I think self discipline is way important. you just have to do it...with motivation or without, just because you took a decision and you must stick to it.

    • rotten brains
      rotten brains 6 महीने पहले

      @Akili Turner i love your take on this, it made me feel much better about myself and was very well-written, thank u and have a nice day! :)

    • Akili Turner
      Akili Turner साल पहले +13

      i don't believe self-discipline is that simple. Motivation is like the engine that keeps us running. It's the force that drives us to produce desired results. It's our inertia. Without motivation it's easy for some of us to chose the less-productive or the instantly gratifying option-- especially when theres little to no consequences. When you grasp the concept of self-motivation , the discipline and commitment just comes naturally. From a book i've learned as humans, our biggest motivator is freedom of control. We want to feel in control of our environment and our lives and not feel forced. By giving ourself choices in our daily chores/tasks/commitments, we earn back that sense of control thus making us more motivated to follow through (because it feels like our own decision and not anyone else's). For instance, we know when we go into work we have an unruly list of tasks to complete by the end of the day; by simply asking ourselves "what would i like to complete first", "what time will i take my break?" or just simply giving yourself the option to complete what task and when, will gratify us with a sense of control we innately desire. From a person who lacked self-discipline for a long time, i had to re-teach myself how to motivate and learn long-term gratification is better than instantaneous. You sound like a pretty disciplined person and like you already have your big motivator yourself (self-commitment). For people like me, that's not a big motivator; i'm pretty okay with falling through on tasks because i don't care too much. If you're interested in the book it's called "Smarter, Faster, Better: The Transformative Power of Real Productivity". It's a great read and dives into the neurological science behind motivation as well as psychological.

  • Deema Ahmed
    Deema Ahmed साल पहले +2

    I absolutely agree with you because we love to be rewarded and encouraged by others

  • Green Coder
    Green Coder साल पहले

    **Fear induces inaction, while the thrill of the game induces action.**
    Start @ [09:44]
    - Social insentive (normative / behavioral compliance)
    - Immediate reward (potential reward discounts over time)
    - Progress monitoring (highlight positive change & further potential)
    - Sense of control (over outcome)
    [14:30] Example in action

  • Tania Abi Azar
    Tania Abi Azar 2 साल पहले +675

    Most used strategy: Threats and Warnings. ---> Scare ourselves and others to change behaviors.
    Science shows that on average: warnings have very limited impact on behavior. Why? The common response on animals when threatened, is either freezing or fleeing NOT fighting, and this is the same for human beings.
    When something scares us, we tend to shut down and get rid of negative feelings like using rationalizations. This can cause a boomerang effect which means that we become more resilient with the behavior we want to change.
    People tend to change their beliefs to the most popular opinion ( positive information more likely).
    Results show that in all age groups take in information that you want to hear rather than information that they didn't want to hear.
    Kids/Teenagers/ Elderly: Did not respond to bad news.
    The three principles to change behavior:
    1. Social incentives ( what people think about you, what other people are doing, and what we can do to do better than others).
    2. Immediate reward ( can be as simple as praise) ( reward yourself or others now, in order to reach a desirable alternative goal in the future, one that the misbehavior can lead to a loss of the desired future goal. Example, if you stop smoking now, you can run 10 km more and win that race)
    3. Progress monitoring: We need to put up a measurement tool that allows us to progress ourselves, whether it was for us or other people. When we see the progress and the positive outcome of our behaviors, it will likely make us want to stick with what we are doing.

    • Aisha dhm
      Aisha dhm 8 महीने पहले

      Thnk you

    • Dicki Syafrudin
      Dicki Syafrudin 11 महीने पहले

      Thank you for recap. This helpful

    • Change Eye Color
      Change Eye Color साल पहले


    • Tania Abi Azar
      Tania Abi Azar साल पहले

      @Jared It's my pleasure to share!

    • Jared
      Jared साल पहले +1

      you could have chose to keep the notes to yourself, but you didn't. thank you for sharing

  • Lessons In Life
    Lessons In Life 3 साल पहले +357

    Stop reacting to others and start responding. Reaction is automatic. Responding is consciously choosing your response. If you don't like your results, change your input, your thoughts, emotions, and expectations. - Marc Reklau

    • DsrtD🌵
      DsrtD🌵 2 साल पहले

      Love it. Like to copy but can't

  • Natalia Castrejón
    Natalia Castrejón 2 साल पहले

    What an awesome speech! Thanks for sharing! I tend to procrastinate school stuff. I generally use fear strategies - thoughts rather than use rewards / opportunity strategies.

  • Aerodyll UK
    Aerodyll UK साल पहले +17

    Imagine doing this with yourself. Have jars that you fill with stones depending on whether you do a good or a bad thing. So when you do a good habit, put a stone in the good jar and when you do a bad thing put a stone in the bad jar. You could set the criteria for what counts as good or bad and you could use the levels of stones in each jar to see how you are trending overall in your habits. You could even place these in a visible place in your home so others could see them.

  • Yuski Iskan
    Yuski Iskan 2 साल पहले

    Self-motivation is a thing that we can get if we realize our self, and always have a good think to others, because we sometimes feel bad, if someone says something bad about us, we over care for our reputation, just believe our goal,

  • Olaf Lieser
    Olaf Lieser साल पहले +7

    It works!
    Here in Germany it has become usual for a town to place a speed radar at the town entrance, and a monitor telling people "you are travelling at ... speed" with a "thankyou" and a smile if you comply with the speed limit - or a "please slow down" if traveling too fast. No police, no citation. But it really works, people want to comply if they have that positive feedback. Positive feedback rather than the abstract warning of dire consequences.
    Just like the nurses with the machine feedback they get regarding cleaning their hands as they enter a patient's room, which the presenter describes.
    It works with me and one can watch drivers respond to this!

    • Kelly B
      Kelly B महीने पहले

      Some places use that here also. Texas, USA.

  • Kay Cali
    Kay Cali 3 साल पहले +2004

    I had to watch this 2-3 times to really grasp what she was saying. She is not saying HOW TO motivate ourself rather HOW WE get motivated.
    1. Social incentive- we are motivated through the positive actions of others. Ex. If we see our friend post a picture of themself at the gym then we want to do the same.
    2. Progress monitoring- We are motivated by seeing progress. Ex. If we start working out too and we see progress by weighing ourself then that helps motivate us to continue.
    3. Immediate Reward- reward your good behavior. Ex. If i workout this whole week then I will treat myself over the weekend. Maybe some pizza or ice cream 😉

    • You can do this! - Dilem
      You can do this! - Dilem 5 महीने पहले

      Yeah, these are helpful!

    • Zee Huss
      Zee Huss साल पहले +1

      @Filme Pe Film I so agree with you. If someone is trying to lose weight, what's the point of exercising if you're going to have pizza or icecream.

    • Tanae B.
      Tanae B. साल पहले

      Great summary! I love this

    • Shivam Shagal
      Shivam Shagal साल पहले

      Knowing the question is part of the solution🤷

    • ty tiw
      ty tiw साल पहले +1

      It's all about pain and pleasure

  • Nasiry
    Nasiry 2 साल पहले +1

    Social incentives: Associate with people that we like to emulate. Avoid those are likely driving us down. Now that makes sense - it is who you know and you are your friends!

  • Corie Little
    Corie Little 5 महीने पहले +1

    Great motivation! You always have to work on yourself and your thoughts.

  • Yusuf Ukaye
    Yusuf Ukaye 2 साल पहले

    I found the video of great use. Tali uses three fantastic areas to motivate change amongst us.
    1. The drive for Social Incentives amongst our selves and within our personal and professional groups.
    2. The immediate rewards that can be reaped from driving the changes
    3. Progress monitoring - Allowing those who have gained their rewards to observe those changes.

  • Proper Psychology
    Proper Psychology 8 महीने पहले +3

    "To change one's life: 1. Start immediately. 2. Do it flamboyantly. 3. No exceptions." - William James (The Father of American Psychology)

  • Designer- Garb
    Designer- Garb 2 साल पहले +1749

    That's how I raised my daughter with encouragement instead of punishment, worked out pretty great.

    • Chidambaram Dinesh
      Chidambaram Dinesh महीने पहले


    • Jeanne
      Jeanne साल पहले +1

      That is what my stepmother does. She lavishes praise for good behavior and is silent on the negative. She is also a teacher since about 45 years and I am very proud of her and have a lot of respect for her.

    • Daniela Martinez
      Daniela Martinez साल पहले +2

      I have a 8 year old and a 1 year old my way of telling them to do something is I will tell my 8 year old I'll give you two options you can either clean the toilet or you can go and help me swipe the floors of course she chooses what is inside her control she can swipe the floors but she can't and don't Like to clean the toilet so she goes and does what she can control without even complaining at all

    • Heisenberg 308
      Heisenberg 308 साल पहले +1

      I’d beg to differ

    • Anbu
      Anbu साल पहले

      @Tiffany Huynh hi

  • Josh S.
    Josh S. 2 साल पहले +3

    A problem with this “positive” motivation is for me it all falls apart when I sense that I’m being manipulated as I’m sure it does for many people and kids are very intuitively tuned in to that. One has to change up strategies often for themselves and others, that could mean changing rewards. At the same time kids need to learn to take care of business with or without rewards by learning it’s much better to have a clean slate ahead of you, that in itself is the reward. One can think clearer and function better in life with a clean house, car and taking care of business.

    • Adriel Rugay
      Adriel Rugay 2 साल पहले +3

      It would be difficult to manipulate yourself if you actually enjoy the reward you give to yourself. If you finished a task at hand, you instinctively do what you like to do like lounge around and watch TV. You feel like you actually deserve to watch TV since you accomplished something instead of feeling guilty when you aren't so productive. So in a sense, "manipulating" yourself actually helps to keep you from procrastination.

  • amorfati khb
    amorfati khb 2 साल पहले +3

    the way she explained this, basically positive reinforcement, actually sounds doable. i think i'm going to do just that, with the progress reports and all.

  • Mahmud Ahsan
    Mahmud Ahsan साल पहले +2

    My notes from this presentation:
    Warnings have a limited impact on behaviour changes.
    e.g. Graphic images of the cigarette packet don't influence to stop smocking.
    Positive information makes us feel good.
    Negative information makes us feel bad.
    If you want to change yourself or others, try the following ways:
    1. Social incentives: Highlighting what other people are doing is high incentives.
    2. Immediate Rewards: An immediate satisfaction.
    3. Progress Monitoring: Highlight the progress, not the decline.
    Fear induces inaction.
    The thrill of a gain generates action.
    Try positive strategies rather than a threat.

  • Legs Sadovsky
    Legs Sadovsky 2 साल पहले +2

    You can instantly test her hypothesis (we tend to absorb positive rather than negative information): probably the most important piece of information you got out of this talk is that it's ok to reward yourself

  • Det3ctive Conan
    Det3ctive Conan 2 साल पहले +108

    When something scares us, we tend to shutdown.
    When we are faced with fear we tend to shutdown in order to eliminate the negative feelings.
    Highlight the progress not the decline.
    Rewards positive behavior. Don't focus on negative behaviour.
    Fear induces inaction.

  • Katherine Belo
    Katherine Belo 2 साल पहले +4

    This seems like something that we totally understand in our daily lives but do not know how to apply it very well to our circumstances. How are you going to apply what you have learned from this video at home, at work, and recreationally?

  • Ronald Caliva
    Ronald Caliva 2 साल पहले +1

    As you age you learn many things along the way how to deal with the problems of everyday living and so on..the most important thing is you learn from your mistakes

  • * V *
    * V * 2 साल पहले +28

    What a speaker, immensely fluent with speech without any pauses or fillers

    • Jenny Geng
      Jenny Geng साल पहले +3

      ikr, she didn't even use "um" during the entire speech

  • Bình Thanh
    Bình Thanh 2 साल पहले +2

    thanks for this video. I was motivated so much. I was very upset about my future, like I don't know where to go, what am I going to do to improve myself. in fact, I tried to quit smoking and do exercises so many times but I failed. after watching this video, I realized that I am doing the wrong way, trying to do something without progress monitoring and immediate rewards. I will get myself up and try again, Thomas Edison said: 'Our greatest weakness lies on giving up. The most certain way to success is to try just one more time.' Thanks for motivating me. I love this video.

  • netzJ
    netzJ 4 साल पहले +505

    Great talk! Also explains why all the little games on mobile phones are so terribly addictive: immediate reward (3 stars), gradual increase of challenge, possibility to do a level over and see immediate improvement, compare with results of others etc. Especially for kids, real life has a hard time competing with that, it's just "too much effort and too little / too distant reward".

    • pantera forever
      pantera forever 2 साल पहले


    • Anh Nguyen
      Anh Nguyen 3 साल पहले

      @Oleksandra Bakun ko ha

    • Palp Amino
      Palp Amino 3 साल पहले +2

      This is why I'm addicted to Clash Royale :(
      Would it be better to delete the game or learn to stop playing after a certain time?

    • Fast Jet Performance
      Fast Jet Performance 3 साल पहले +1

      @Oleksandra Bakun look up 'SuperBetter' by Jane McGonigal, that book was written for you.

    • Oleksandra Bakun
      Oleksandra Bakun 3 साल पहले +3

      Yeah, I'm addicted to gaming for this reason. I've been wondering how to make my life a "game" with clear path, small bite-sized challenges and unlocked harder challenges and rewards.

  • You can do this! - Dilem
    You can do this! - Dilem 5 महीने पहले

    Love the advice & already implementing it! Changed my life.

  • Kaitlin Cullis
    Kaitlin Cullis साल पहले +595

    I play a little mind game that I learned from “Your Success Method by Michael Kennedy” …so whenever I feel that I’m gonna procrastinate on a task or feeling that my motivation is off, I start playing this “game” in my mind that reframes the whole task and makes it a whole lot easier for me to work on the task instead of letting my mind say “I’ll do it later”, its not the same as visualisations which is less powerful IMO

    • Change Eye Color
      Change Eye Color साल पहले


    • marike groot
      marike groot साल पहले

      Mary Poppins taught us this first 🤣

    • Lee Lorenz
      Lee Lorenz साल पहले +1

      reframe the whole task to make it easier how?

    • Valexi Cat
      Valexi Cat साल पहले +1

      What is this game you play?

    • Sandielyn Mae Mandabon
      Sandielyn Mae Mandabon साल पहले +1

      You should also try reading 5secondrule by mel robins

  • Zulfikar Aspa
    Zulfikar Aspa 2 साल पहले

    It's a great insight. In a larger perspective, this strategy can be adopted to accelerate change management process either in a small or big organization.

  • RuthannLentz
    RuthannLentz 4 महीने पहले +3

    Really great. My son is on the spectrum and the constant treats that he’ll lose computer time was like pushing a boulder up a hill. Instead I just let him know what the expectation for the day is, you get your school work done you can have computer time. The sooner he’s done the more time he gets. Home schooling has never been easier.

  • Draw with Ambu🌺
    Draw with Ambu🌺 साल पहले +2

    Feeling so relaxed after hearing this.....I always try to fit in good habits within a good and healthy daily routine.....but i can't be consistent....but swear from now on I'm gonna make it....

  • mariathecute
    mariathecute 2 साल पहले

    Wow! Such an important lesson to learn! Thank you!

  • Elester Owers
    Elester Owers साल पहले

    I respect you sharing your story about your Dad. It help me to reflect on my time with my Dad, he was born in 1896, and I was born in 1956 and I was only 11 years old when he passed

  • TotorBoat
    TotorBoat 2 साल पहले

    Love it. Such a great presentation and presenter.

  • w s
    w s 2 साल पहले +4

    One of the Best Ted Talks ever!!
    You cant motivate a change with negative ideas/feelings but you can with positive behavior.

  • Edgar Jose Becerra
    Edgar Jose Becerra साल पहले

    excellent! I liked the explanation, the examples let us remember what you want to teach us, well done!!!

  • Joanna Olisa
    Joanna Olisa 2 साल पहले +1

    Loved this TedTalk. Definitely trying out the three suggestions on how to change behavior right away.

  • Jeniffer Nanlal
    Jeniffer Nanlal 2 साल पहले

    Thank you. Great speech and so true. Much appreciated.

  • Gina G.
    Gina G. 3 साल पहले +139

    As a teacher of students with behavioral problems I reward them all the time. And they behave for the most part, produce results, are motivated and most importantly learn!! I've done it for 19 years and when people tell me I'm good at what I do, I know it's because kids are engaged and motivated to get their rewards, so they participate in classroom work.

    • Rafael Kirianki
      Rafael Kirianki 2 साल पहले

      Hi x

    • Woody Longshore
      Woody Longshore 2 साल पहले

      @DsrtD🌵, I concur. That is a principal who just does not get "it." S/he obviously needs encouragement to pursue continuing education in the area of psychology of learning, motivation, and solution-focused cognitive-behavioral approaches. My question is who is the boss of this principal? Perhaps this individual too needs to lead by effective example.

    • Sujit Jagat
      Sujit Jagat 2 साल पहले

      give me an example or solution on how to get motivation to change my behaviour on quitting my masturbation addiction?? can you throw some light on that?

    • DsrtD🌵
      DsrtD🌵 2 साल पहले

      Did you see the News in LA when a teacher gave her class incentive reward for doing well on a project?
      She offered pizza for lunch for ALL. But she was shut down by the school Principal ! He took all ordered/ delivered pizzas away!! He said its a bad idea because other classrooms don't get any pizza. 😨😱 OMG! He certainly was a demotivating Principal. Negative thinking.

    • Maralyse Kaitlin
      Maralyse Kaitlin 2 साल पहले +5

      Gina Gutierrez what are the rewards that you give to them? My best friend is a new teacher and is looking for positive reinforcement ideas! Thank you in advance.

  • ABV Motivation
    ABV Motivation 2 साल पहले

    Success does not come on our own, we decide who we should be. Excellent video!

    KEERTHANA S 4 महीने पहले

    Have to say such an amazing and motivating TED talk

  • Pedro Cartaxo
    Pedro Cartaxo साल पहले +1

    O cérebro reage melhor ao reforço positivo do que à critica ou ameaça.
    De forma natural, as pessoas tendem a ser recetivas ao:
    - reconhecimento social,
    - à recompensa imediata e
    - à visão de progresso e resultados nos seus comportamentos.
    Quando são confrontadas com sentimentos de medo ou de desvalorização pessoal, tendem a fechar-se, evitar o contacto, desvalorizar o 'mensageiro' ou arranjar desculpas.
    No entanto, nem todas as situações podem ser encaradas da mesma forma. Em alguns casos pode ser importante a critica construtiva ou a visão futura de uma consequência negativa.

  • Gauri Goyal
    Gauri Goyal साल पहले +2

    OMG!!!! I have been struggling with getting myself to study and study consistently. Every day I feared and my brother warns me that if i do not, I will fail to good GPA and therefore a good college. But all that fear has been giving me nothing but stress and I knew that. I did not know how to change it for thinking positive is not so easy. As I was watching this video and heard the medical staff washing hands example, an idea struck to me. I put up a chart and every time I do something productive or good, I'll give myself a star. I have tired this before but it was that I would make myself a butterfly but making a origami butterfly took too much time whereas a star is instant and hence makes me happier. Thinking about getting more stars made me want to do questions but the moment I thought about how if I do not do them I will not be able to make it made me sad and kind of paralyzed again. The moment I put up the chart I got three stars. One for getting the idea of doing so and hence figuring out a good solution to the problem, 2 for making my friend smile, and three for how I resisted cheating on the test today when I easily could have. Now that I am thinking about it there are so many things I do everyday that deserve stars. God I'm happy!!! Tears of JOY! 😭😭😭😭
    I thought I will cut every star for making a mistake but I don't wanna ruin my chart. What should I do? Should I cut every star for slipping up or not? It's okay to slip up at times. I don't want to be afraid of making mistakes. Okay so I will not cut any star but for every slip up, a potential star would be reduced. So I would have also have chance to take responsibility and make up for my mistakes. But 3 slip ups cause no stars for the day.

    • Regina Dean Reed
      Regina Dean Reed 4 महीने पहले +1

      Keep the mistakes. When we make mistakes it helps us to learn. We are always taught that mistakes are bad, but you can use your mistakes to make small improvements and learn from them. It is okay to slip up at times.

  • Worship Freedom
    Worship Freedom साल पहले +1

    We need more social incentives, immediate rewards and progress monitoring for climate change. If we’re all honest, a threatening graph or statistic won’t really change our behaviour..

  • Coolen Des
    Coolen Des साल पहले

    I think self discipline is way important. you just have to do it...with motivation or without, just because you took a decision and you must stick to it.

  • R Lee
    R Lee 2 साल पहले +6

    On my daily to do list I always put 2 things that I do anyway so I never feel like nothing is getting done. Keep life positive 😀

  • Ken Hoover
    Ken Hoover 2 साल पहले

    This is very interesting. I am going to implement these strategies to resume my workouts. Thank you!

  • Donna S
    Donna S 3 साल पहले +18

    Very impressive and motivating! I love how you go in-depth by breaking the information down into easy understanding! My ADD brain needed this! Thank you, keep up the good work and don't allow the negatives or critics to hinder your growth and mindset!

  • Wendy Sea
    Wendy Sea 10 महीने पहले

    Thank you!! Very interesting and I will assimilate this into my life. Love it!

  • Süleyman A.
    Süleyman A. साल पहले +2

    the important question is that why most of people don't follow these hints to make a better world than currently .Thanks Tali Sharot :)

  • Bhristopher Bolumbus
    Bhristopher Bolumbus साल पहले +1

    that is very insightful and is just what i needed to know ... self-motivation can be an uphill struggle and i don't believe anyone is exempt.

  • The White Collar Gypsy
    The White Collar Gypsy साल पहले +2

    Thank you so much madam for this beautiful and truly inspiring talk.

  • Kirk Raynor
    Kirk Raynor साल पहले

    i thought this was going to be all gushy and motivational, but was actually very well thought out and helpful. Will be using these strategies!!!

  • Skull Rock Incorporated
    Skull Rock Incorporated 2 साल पहले

    I absolutely love this video. Ideas are amazing! I will be creating content starting 4/27/2020, and will specify in motivational and inspirational content. The principles in this video align with what I have in my videos that I will upload! How amazing!

  • Mathew DSouza
    Mathew DSouza 2 साल पहले

    Amazing presentation on what motivates people in the modern era.

  • YYYYY778
    YYYYY778 साल पहले

    Definitely useful information on how our brains work in term of motivation

  • Kim Jama
    Kim Jama साल पहले

    Wow. Just wow. Every tiny little detail you explain it coherently and comprehensively

  • Rok Podlogar
    Rok Podlogar साल पहले +1

    you could also learn from this, that kids and the elderly look on life more positively and induce less stress and worries on themselves thus freeing up their minds to enjoy the present moment.

  • Ty
    Ty 2 साल पहले

    She made a lot of sense. People don’t worry about something until they’re in danger or it’s too late. Even though they were previously warned. They brushed it aside since they weren’t affected yet.

  • Jessica
    Jessica साल पहले

    Giving people a sense of control is a really important motivator - 16:48

  • Double R Interns
    Double R Interns साल पहले +3

    I see a field of sunflowers in your future as you continue your amazing journey, Aly. Congratulations on this excellent mission!

  • Jose Gornoz
    Jose Gornoz 8 महीने पहले

    Maravilloso talk, love it.

  • Judith Walker
    Judith Walker साल पहले

    This is awesome!
    It makes total sense and I think it just may be the help I need!

  • John Lee
    John Lee साल पहले

    that is very insightful and is just what i needed to know ... self-motivation can be an uphill struggle and i don't believe anyone is exempt.

  • Sha Hala
    Sha Hala साल पहले

    Talking to you all who feel like you can't change your life around...I was like that for a long time, but I succeeded in changing my life by 180 degrees and now I am a 100% happier person than I was before. The one thing that really helped me was Forwago because it made me change the way I think and look at everything.

  • titleten
    titleten 2 साल पहले +5

    Great. 16:12 summarizes it nicely: "Fear induces inaction, while the thrill of a gain induces action.